The Children's Aid Society of London & Middlesex

"The goal of discipline is to teach children acceptable behaviour. Hitting children does not teach acceptable behaviour. Hitting children teaches them that “might makes right,” and hitting is a way to solve problems."

• Whenever possible, teach rather than punish.  

• View children’s misbehaviour as a mistake in judgment…it will be easier to think of ways to teach more acceptable behaviour.

• Whenever possible, make consequences relate to misbehaviour…if a child makes a mess, he/she should clean it up.

• Have behaviour rules but make sure they are few in number, reasonable and appropriate to the child’s age and development.

• Make sure that consequences for misbehaviour are reasonable and clear.

• Do not argue or nag children about rules. If a rule is broken, remind the child of the rule and the consequence for not following the rule. When you give a command, speak in a firm voice and repeat the command.

• If your child has many behaviours that concern you, do not try to change all of them at once. Choose one behaviour of concern. Explain why the behaviour is a problem, provide consequences for misbehaviour and praise the behaviour opposite of the misbehaviour when your child demonstrates it.

• Distract infants and toddlers when they are doing something you do not like or remove them from the situation. Infants and toddlers do not understand right and wrong and should not be hit or shaken.

"Catch your child being good, a hug, a smile and soft words will show your approval!"

• Use good manners when talking to children about their behaviour. Be sure to use “I am sorry”, “May I?” and “Excuse me” when they are appropriate. Be a good model for your children in your speech and actions.

• Catch your child being good! Your praise will increase appropriate behaviour.